Distance!

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When you migrate, the miles of distance separate you and pull you away from your family. In some cases, this distance can be positive, however, in many cases, it is painful. My parents, my sisters, the people who saw me grow up, are not here. The distance from the people you love can sometimes be difficult to handle. I wasn’t prepared for this. No one tells you what it feels like to be part of a story that keeps being written but from afar.

I remember the first time I felt the magnitude of the separation. I was in the middle of a phone call with my mom. We were talking as usual, but in her tone, I could perceive a slight sadness. “I miss you,” she said, very spontaneously. I felt a silent pain and didn’t know how to handle it. I was only able to say the same back, “I miss you too, Mom.” That was a difficult moment in the middle of the distance. My parents didn’t expect family visits to go from being a custom or a simple decision to something that had to be planned months in advance.

Sometimes, I find myself deeply missing those simple moments: talking to my mom in her bedroom, with my dad in the car, or having a casual chat with one of my sisters. Those moments are irreplaceable, but, although video calls can’t replace a real hug, they have allowed us to continue sharing our best and worst moments. Those moments are still important. My parents have gotten used to the calls, to the long chats with their daughters over the phone. It was never what they imagined, it was never what they dreamed of, but they accepted it because they understand this is the only way to keep us connected.

Distance doesn’t mean forgetfulness or absence, it simply changes the way we connect. Those conversations with my family, sometimes short, other times endless, are a way of staying present in their lives, even if it’s different. Video calls, voice calls, chats, photos sent by message, and updates on everything that’s happening over there in the daily routine, became our new "together time."

Here, my life has taken a different course, with new responsibilities tying me to this new country and with a new routine. But the calls with my family, sometimes lasting for hours, make me feel connected.

It’s a strange paradox: distance challenged us to find new ways to connect, but it has also taught us to value these connections more deeply. Relationships aren’t always built in the same space, nor at the same time. Sometimes, they are built through a screen, in a conversation that doesn’t even have to end with an "I love you."

I don’t know if I will ever fully get used to the distance because it’s not easy to bear. Many times, I think about the day when my parents will stop saying "I miss you" when they’re no longer in this world, and I suffer deeply from this thought. But what I do know is that, although distance continues to be challenging, the way my family and I have adapted to it is a testament to what love can do. And at this moment, that’s what matters the most.

Hello! I’m Martha Navarro, a proud Colombian who made the leap to Canada in 2020. As an immigrant, I’ve navigated the ups and downs of starting anew in a foreign land, facing challenges that many of us know all too well. This blog is my little corner of the internet where I share my experiences, insights, and stories. I believe that while the immigrant journey can be tough, it also brings us together in unexpected ways. Through my words, I hope to connect with others who may be feeling isolated or overwhelmed. You're not alone—we share a bond that transcends borders. Join me as we explore the immigrant experience, celebrate our resilience, and find comfort in our shared stories. Together, we can create a supportive community where we uplift each other and remind ourselves that we are all connected.

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